a year ago, today.

Dear Remy, 

One year ago, today, I found out that you were growing inside me. I had been so sick for several days, and everything thought I was pregnant and didn’t want to say so; I didn’t want to think about it, either. Not because I didn’t want you–quite the contrary. But I was afraid I’d get my hopes up, and be disappointed.

So I cried all night the night before, and I barely slept. And in the morning I took a test. And guess what? Pregnant.

It was the first positive test I had ever seen!

So I told your Daddy, and we cried together. Then he went to the kitchen and got some oil, and he put it on my forehead and my belly (with you inside) and on the door of the room that you sleep in at home. And he prayed for us, for all of us, that I would be safe and that you would be healthy and that he would be a good Daddy. And we thanked God for you. Amen. 

Love, Mommy

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a year ago, today.

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